Sunday Girl Read online

  ‘Jennifer O’Driscoll, you are a true friend. One sip of alcohol will cause an immediate evacuation of my stomach.’

  ‘What a lovely thought! Here, I also got you a cheese and onion pasty. Don’t pull faces at me, you ungrateful bag. Eat, it will do you good.’

  Kath took small bites and swallowed with difficulty. Jenny finished her sandwich and fought her way to the bar for refills. Kath pushed the food aside and rested her head in her hands; wondering how she got up this morning, let alone made it to college. Habit, Tuesday was a school day, and so she came to college, courtesy of Ritzon Paints who did not approve of their employees bunking off.

  Then there was Jenny, who worked as a research assistant in the sociology department, and what better way to break up the day with lunch in the Student Union bar. The perfect time to enjoy a chat, a bite to eat and a beer, yuk, not the last two of those today. Kath’s stomach gave an ominous gurgle, and an acid burp roasted the back of her throat. She grabbed her glass and gulped down her drink, hoping the ice would soothe the inferno of her innards.

  ‘These were full when I left the bar,’ said Jenny as she plonked herself down. ‘And some clumsy twerp spilt beer all over me.’

  ‘Beer shampoo can help control dandruff.’ Kath tried to enter the spirit of things. ‘And leaves you with fantastically shiny hair.’

  ‘But not so fantastic for my trousers. I suppose I will dry off, but here is too stinking like a brewery for the rest of the day. Cheers!’

  They drank. Kath downed her second lime and soda in one while Jenny took a demure sip of her pint.

  ‘Kath, I have known you since primary school. I have seen you blitzed numerous times, but never have I seen you throw alcohol down your neck with such gay abandon as you did on Sunday.’

  ‘I had an excuse,’ said Kath, ‘I was a bit depressed.’

  ‘Why, did Mr Wonderful stand you up again?’

  ‘Yes, but that was not the reason I was down.’

  ‘Come off it, Kath. He’s been giving you the run-around for months. This bloke is not good for you. He is just a married man looking for his extra-marital kicks.’

  ‘Jen, we went through this last Friday. I realise, I’m acting like a prat, but I am happy.’

  ‘Yeah, I saw that by the way, you drank yourself stupid on Sunday. You were completely rat-arsed, and when my brother tried to take you home, you threw up in his car and called him a bastard-git of a sales rep.’

  ‘Dave is a sales rep.’

  ‘He is not a bastard-git of one. You upset him calling him names and poor Julie had to clean up your puke.’

  ‘I don’t remember any of that.’ Kath was aghast, ‘I’ll call them tonight and apologise.’

  ‘I should. You are rapidly running out of friends since you began seeing your bastard-git of a married lover. How long has it been?’

  ‘Two months, but it’s natural to want to be together as much as possible.’

  ‘No doubt your quality time depends on when he can get away from his wife.’

  ‘It is difficult,’ said Kath, mistaking sarcasm for sympathy. ‘I have been seeing Tony,’ she rolled the words over her tongue, relishing the chance to say his name out loud. ‘Tony Buffery, since August twenty-fourth. We first made love in September, on the twelfth.’

  ‘He is a slow worker.’

  Kath ignored Jenny and carried on talking. ‘On the fifteenth of September, he told me he loved me.’

  ‘Be still my beating heart,’ murmured Jenny.

  ‘Now I am hopelessly hooked on the bastard. I know Tony is married, but we love each other, and when the time is right, he will leave his wife for me.’

  ‘Kathryn, you are beyond hope and help, but I wish you’d pull your head out of the clouds and look at the real world.’

  The sharpness of Jenny’s voice brought Kath up short, and Jenny’s face was not a reassuring sight. Her grin gone and her lips pressed tight to hold back any biting comments. Only her pale blue eyes expressed a deep-seated concern. Kath felt a surge of irritation: Why couldn’t people leave her alone to sort out her own life? She clenched her fists in her lap.

  ‘I know you think I go around in rose-tinted spectacles, but—’

  ‘More like sunglasses, sometimes you don’t see the world at all,’ snapped Jenny. ‘You’ve changed since you been with this Tony, he’s turning you into his toy, his little pet dog. You’re at his beck and call.’

  Jenny made it sound dirty and wrong when it was nothing like that. Kath didn’t know how to explain and make people understand. Not able to meet Jenny’s hard stare, she looked down and saw chewed and ragged nails. These weren’t her hands; she never bit her nails, never!

  ‘Jen, can we drop this subject? I don’t want to discuss this at the moment.’

  ‘You have precious little else to talk about.’

  Kath looked up. Jenny’s resigned smile took the sting out of her words. They stared at each other. This time Kath forced herself not to look away. Jenny frowned, and then let out a long sigh of defeat.

  ‘OK, enough of your trials and tribs. Let’s start on safer subjects, for instance, what did you think of my latest? If you can remember much of Sunday.’

  ‘Earnest.’

  ‘No, his name is Jim.’

  ‘Ha-ha, your wit never ceases to amaze me. No, definitely earnest, he is...? What is the word I’m looking for?’

  ‘Horny?’

  ‘I am not talking about his body, dear, but his mind, as my old dad would say an angry young man, but a jolly handsome one. He reminds me of a skinny Eddie Murphy, but with a bum, you could die for, but I guess you know more about that.’

  ‘This man is so sexy, and he is an absolute marvel in bed.’

  ‘Per-leese,’ said Kath. ‘Enough of this smut, you are turning my stomach. Are you in love or lust?’

  ‘Both,’ said Jenny. ‘I had a thing for Jim ever since I was first assigned to his research project. It was like Christmas come early when I finally got him to ask me out. We’ve been together now for two weeks, and already we’ve declared our undying love for each other. Sickening isn’t it?’

  Kath pretended to vomit.

  ‘I feel like a giggly schoolgirl. He’s taking me to meet his parent’s next Sunday.’ Jenny blushed, her purple cheeks clashing with her orange hair. ‘I’m knitting him a jumper for his birthday.’

  ‘Uh-oh chungo,’ warbled Kath. ‘Another one bites the dust. It’ll be wedding bells and cocoa at bedtime soon.’

  ‘Heaven forbid,’ Jenny shuddered. ‘Why screw up a good relationship by marrying the bugger?’

  ‘You want to speak to my cousin Claire; she got engaged last week and is getting married in December.’

  ‘Shotgun wedding?’

  ‘Aunty Linda denies it, although, Uncle George must have his suspicions. It would be the one reason he married my dear Aunty Linda.’

  ‘Is George going to the wedding?’ Jenny always showed an interest in the feuding between Kath’s uncle and his ex-wife.

  ‘Of course, he is giving the bride away; unfortunately, Linda doesn’t want Jeanette there.’

  ‘They divorced years ago, and he didn’t leave her for Jeanette in the first place. How can you be so bitter for so long?’

  Kath shrugged, and Jenny laughed. ‘Marriage should come with a government health warning.’

  ‘It is not the great institution it’s cracked up to be,’ said Kath. ‘It didn’t work out for Liz and John.’

  ‘Haven’t you heard? They’re back together again.’

  ‘I thought she ran off with that bloke from the DIY place?’

  ‘She did,’ said Jenny. ‘But now she is back with her long-suffering spouse. They’re talking about moving to Wolverhampton and starting again. I can understand their need to move away, but Wolverhampton, I ask you?’

  ‘I take it there are no single young men under the age of twenty-five in Wolverhampton?’

  ‘Ooh, bitchy-bitchy.’ Jenny lit up a cigarette. ‘Our
Lizzie does like her men to be in their prime, and now John is twenty-six and Liz is thirty-four, things could get interesting.’

  ‘I’d like to see her in fifteen years tapping up men young enough to be her son. She’ll have to turn the lights off to hide her wrinkles.’

  ‘Catty Kathy,’ Jenny blew smoke in Kath’s face. ‘Kathryn, why this downer on older married people at the moment? Does your ageing lover dim the lights to hide his beer belly and his bald patch? Ooh-ee, your face.’ Jenny tapped Kath on the nose. ‘What’s annoyed you? My little joke, or the fact unfaithful partners always go back to their loved ones in the end?’

  They sat in silence, broken by Kath grinding her teeth.

  ‘Keep doing that, and you’ll be wearing dentures by the time you’re thirty.’

  Kath grinned, it was impossible to be angry with Jenny for long. ‘What a marvellous friend you are, Jennifer. If you’re not nagging me silly over my love life, you depress me with the thought of a toothless future.’

  ‘All part of the service,’ said Jenny. ‘Now I’ll tell you three things to put a smile on your face. This is why I called yesterday. Item one, Dan and Sue are having their housewarming party on Saturday.’

  ‘I didn’t even realise they’d put an offer in on a place.’ The news confused Kath. ‘When did that happen?’

  ‘Back in August, if you were paying attention,’ Jenny gave Kath a stern look. ‘They moved last week, into a breeze block up Bickleigh way.’

  ‘But that is the middle of Dartmoor.’ Kath ignored Jenny’s not-so-subtle dig.

  ‘Don’t exaggerate,’ Jenny chided her. ‘Although I admit it will be easier to get there by taxi rather than by bus.’

  ‘That’ll cost a fortune, and I don’t care what you say, Bickleigh is miles away. Dan and Sue won’t be having many parties out there.’

  ‘Which is why they are having a bit of a do now. Soon, they’ll be more interested in decorating their new home than having parties.’

  ‘Who’s going?’ said Kath with a vague feeling of unease, it was as if everyone was moving on and leaving her behind.

  ‘Me and Jim, Mickey and Allie, my bastard-git of a brother and Julie,’ Jenny gave her an impish grin. ‘And the newly reformed John and Liz amongst others.’

  ‘Couples, always couples with me playing chaperone again,’ moaned Kath.

  ‘Not so, oh miserable one, wait until I tell you the next thing on my list. Guess who’s coming back to town?’

  ‘Surprise me.’

  ‘Hero of the non-working classes. Your friend and mine, none other than Miles David Deforest,’ Jenny announced.

  ‘You aren’t kidding me? I didn’t know he was coming back,’ burbled Kath. ‘I keep meaning to write to him.’

  ‘Well, now he’s saved you the cost of a stamp.’

  ‘That’s the kind of daft thing he would say.’ Kath smiled at the thought of seeing him. ‘Miles could always make me laugh. He is like a whiff of nitrous oxide in a dull world.’

  ‘I hoped that might cheer you up. The last thing to tell you should put the cherry on the icing. One of the blokes on Sunday asked after you.’

  ‘Who, and more to the point, is he single?’

  ‘A guy called Darren. He was wearing leather trousers, but we all have our little faults.’

  ‘Was he the one who kept calling me Kate?’

  ‘You were both very drunk,’ said Jenny. ‘But if you promise to be on your best behaviour, I’ll invite him along to the party on Saturday. You can throw yourself at him in a futile attempt to forget your married lover.’

  Kath pulled a face at Jenny, who only laughed until she spotted the clock behind the bar. ‘Arse, nearly two o’clock! I’m going to be late, and so are you.’

  ‘Nah, my afternoon lectures got cancelled,’ Kath drawled. ‘My next class is at five.’

  ‘You part-timers have it so easy.’ Jenny picked up her cigarettes and hurried away. ‘I’ll see you in the gym on Thursday,’ she called over her shoulder.

  Kath went to the bar and ordered another lime and soda. Then throwing caution to the wind, she asked for a packet of pork scratchings. Back at the table, she unearthed her diary from the detritus of her bag to check if she were free Saturday. Yeah, right, she thought, I’m not fooling anyone. She was checking if Tony was available and it appeared he was. A smiley face drawn on the page meant he might get away for a few hours.

  Some choice, sacrifice the housewarming on the off chance Tony might be available. She missed her birthday because of him, instead of being with her family, Kath spent it sitting on her own in a pub. Tony turned up late, but she waited the whole evening for a quick half hour. She thought it romantic at the time. Now she was not so sure because her mother had not called her in the two weeks since.

  Kath flicked through the diary, noting the abundance of little smiley faces. Everything revolved around Tony these days with too many evenings spent home alone because she was waiting for the phone to ring. She had no social life anymore and had no intention of missing yet another party, especially one with a single man to mess around with. Not to mention the return of Miles, who rivalled Jenny for the position of best friend.

  ‘You. Can. Sod. Right. Off.’ She said it aloud much to the annoyance of the woman trying to collect the empties. Kath gave her an apologetic smile, but she stomped off to attack another table.

  Let’s see what effect a trial separation has on our relationship? I am a complete doormat and let him take me for granted. We only have sex whenever he wants it. Not that she ever made the first move. Losing her virginity to an older man was fine in one sense. She got an experienced lover with a better understanding of a woman’s body, but what was she supposed to do, wiggle or thrust?

  Sex was fun, but where was the earth-shattering joy and screaming? Maybe it improved over time, but not this evening because today college was coming first. She sniggered at her pun, but there would be no bunking off to meet Tony. He could wait for her to finish at nine or go and piss up his kilt. Kath packed her bag and marched off to the library for an afternoon of much-neglected study.

  tie a yellow ribbon round the old oak tree

  ‘Good grief, what a spud!’ Kath stopped in the road. ‘How can anyone in their right mind want to live in such a hideous house? It looks like a council toilet block.’

  ‘It is incredibly ugly but very cheap.’ Jenny walked on ahead. ‘And looks better on the inside.’

  ‘The rooms are big with high ceilings, and the view from the back is beautiful, you can see across the moor,’ said Jim.

  ‘I hope Sue’s got a stout pair of wellies.’ Kath tried to avoid another muddy puddle. ‘It’ll be a pig up here in winter.’

  ‘I would love to live somewhere like this,’ said Jenny. ‘Think of the clean air and space up here.’

  ‘Amen to that.’ Jim threw out his arms and spun around.

  ‘Very Julie Andrews,’ observed Jenny. ‘A shame Dartmoor is not on the same scale as Austria.’

  ‘Climb every mountain,’ yodelled Jim. ‘Over the border and on to freedom.’

  ‘Excellent idea,’ said Jenny, ‘but this place is too close to the city for my taste.’

  ‘We are miles from anywhere,’ said Kath.

  ‘No, we aren’t,’ Jenny contradicted her. ‘The hospital is within walking distance.’

  Kath raised an eyebrow, and Jim snorted.

  ‘Cycling distance, then,’ conceded Jenny.

  ‘Five miles over this terrain is hardly a pleasant jaunt,’ said Kath. ‘Mind you more exercise might help Sue shift some of her weight.’

  ‘She has lost weight,’ said Jenny.

  ‘At least half a stone since I first met her,’ said Jim.

  ‘That was quick.’ Kath was astounded at the news of plump nursey Sue turned slim.

  ‘She’s been doing Weight Watchers since September and lost over a stone. Sue’s looking good now, isn’t she Jim?’

  ‘Not as good as you, my little dumpling,’ Jim gr
abbed Jenny in a bear hug and nibbled her neck. She laughed and tried to wriggle out of his grasp.

  Kath watched the horseplay with envy; if only Tony were here biting her neck and paying her ridiculous compliments. She wanted Jenny and Jim’s intimacy and openness. Why couldn’t she meet someone like Jim? Someone unattached and as easy going. Someone to fall effortlessly and painlessly in love with.

  ‘Come on you two, before you are arrested for indecent behaviour.’

  Jenny and Jim untangled themselves. ‘The beer must be shaken to buggery by now.’ Jenny inspected the contents of her carrier bag.

  ‘Let me see.’ Jim took a can, shook it, and pointed it at Jenny. ‘Bath time,’ he whooped.

  ‘Don’t you dare,’ squealed Jenny. She dropped her bags and ran down the road. Jim laughed and chased after her.

  Kath picked up the bags and walked up the path to the front door. Noise came from the open windows in uneven waves. Music, shouts and singing, the crash as a glass shattered on bare floorboards. The muffled panic as someone found a dustpan and brush. Boy, was she nervous? She felt like the prodigal son. Would they wheel out the fatted calf for her?

  A pounding of feet on the path behind her reminded Kath to duck. A wave of beer flew past and splattered on the door. ‘You got to be quick to catch me out,’ she smirked at a sheepish Jim.

  He winked at her. ‘I’ll get you later.’

  ‘Is that a promise or a threat?’

  ‘Look at Jenny and tell me what you think.’

  Jenny dripped into view. ‘You bastard!’

  ‘Didn’t your mother warn you against going out with wet hair?’ Jim couldn’t contain his mirth.

  Jenny flipped a V-sign at him and shook herself, spraying both Jim and Kath with beer. Jim roared with laughter while Kath held the bags up in self-defence.

  ‘I thought we said no pets.’ A man appeared in the doorway. ‘Tell your sheepdog to calm down, and you can come in.’

  ‘Oh, Danny boy,’ sang Jenny, leaping forward to give Dan a hug.

  ‘Get off, you are soaking wet, and you stink of beer. Jim, come and get her. No, on second thoughts, give us a kiss.’